📲 What If You Didn't Need to Worry About Unplugging?
Maybe there's a easier way to manage screentime
Unplugging is now kind of impossible in our society.
And maybe that’s okay.
No need for anybody to get their panties in an uproar. (I’m never really sure what that expression means but wow is it fun to say — and maybe we’d even like it?)
We’ve reached the point with the internet where electricity was in the U.S. in the 1930s or so — it’s everywhere but there are rural pockets that remain untouched.
So maybe we need to move beyond fretting (imagine being worried in 1935 about electricity) and concentrate on sustainable, useful ways to regulate our own adult behavior. (Screentime impacts on children are still troubling — and that’s a different story and a different newsletter.)
A Past History of Fretting
For a while (okay, many years), I was concerned about screens and our brain development, our distracted states, and our inability to focus on long content.
I leaned into digital minimalism, geeking out on books by Cal Newport and others. I experimented with my own routines and habits — testing my own brain and its attendant properties of concentration.
I delayed my children’s adoption of some technology: no phone until 8th grade, never a TV in the bedroom, and I spoke plainly about the problems with social media since 2008. (Recently, they actually acknowledged that I got that part of parenting right. They’ve always immensely enjoyed the internet but it doesn’t run their lives.)
Yet recently I’ve abandoned fretting (and screen-management apps) and I’ve come up with a newer, simpler way to manage my own internet time.
It requires no complex system, no digital sabbaths, and none of those fucking annoying “screen usage” notifications. (God, I hate when my phone nags me.)
The New System
I now have a one-step management system for my screentime:
When I feel bad, I stop scrolling.
That’s it. Totally it.
A simple and foolproof method. (Which I tested on me because I can be a fool!)
Feel bad? Stop scrolling.
Feel okay? Permission to scroll is granted.
Because You Might Not Really Be Needing Content
Scrolling is our modern version of stress eating, except we consume content with our eyes instead of junk food with our hands. (And sometimes we do both. Hello, nachos and doom-scrolling — the official meal of the pandemic!)
Sometimes you just need to close the fridge door and realize you’re not actually hungry, you’re just sad or lonely or bored. Ditto with your screens.
What you’re searching for may not even be available through your chosen means of connection. Better to close the screen and take a walk. Or:
Work out
Read a book
Draw pictures that reveal how tremendously untalented you are at simple art
Why Not Try It?
So, the next time you’re wandering the digital wilderness, lost on your 10th maddening political article or a 25th pimple-popping video on TikTok (those are a big hit!), do this:
Shake yourself awake.
Ask yourself out loud: “Do I feel good?”
Check in with you — and actively recognize when you’re just shoveling digital chips down your throat instead of actually savoring a snack.
And then if you feel bad, put it down and go do something else.
It’s a simple question/answer but it just might change your life. And wouldn’t that be something? Imagine making technology work for you instead of you working for technology.
P.S. Bonus read: Fight the Algorithms — “because you are more than a collection of your likes.”
And bonus bad AI art! I present “panties in an uproar” from Craiyon:
I do this a lot, too. In recent years I've been able to really hone in on how digital consumption makes me feel, and a lot of the time it's just not good. One of the biggest tests for anyone, IMO, is to sit alone in a room without TV, music, or smartphone distractions. Can you sit with your own thoughts without feeling a creeping sense of dread? If not, examine why you feel that way. Learn to meditate on it, use an app like Calm or Headspace to manage your thoughts and be more comfortable with fleeting sensations coming and going. It's so important to be aware of what's going on in your head rather than willfully seeking distraction because you don't want to face it. That's advice that I think everyone should live by. Great article btw!!
Yes. It doesn't need to be at all complicated. Mindful check-ins are what's needed. And I enjoyed your drawings of hands. 😅 it certainly relieved some of my stress.